Post-holiday recap.

Christmas 2010 has come and gone.  I did not succumb to the lure of cookies or candies.  Yay!!!   My best gift is how wonderful I feel compared to last year.  Our family holiday celebrations are rather low key.  It was delightful to watch my 13 month-old grandson and his total delight with his new toys. 

We did not have a White Christmas but we are having a Boxing Day Blizzard!!  As I write this it is snowing and blowing like crazy! 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Healthier Lifestyle

Well, Dr. Jarrett didn't like my idea about climbing stairs at lunch.  He feels that the short burst of exertion does not burn many calories nor does it really have much other benefit.  He thinks I'd be better off just walking for 20 minutes.  His recommendations include choosing parking spots further away from my destination and doing extra laps at the mall when shopping.  These habits along with dedicated exercise times every day are encouraged.  I've not had a lot of motivation for all that these days.

The colder, darker days approaching the winter solstice have traditionally been difficult for me.  In previous years I have tended to gain weight like a bear preparing to hibernate.  In fact, only last minute desperation inspires me to be ready for the holidays.. Six days until Christmas and I have very little shopping done.  Our tree is up but not decorated.  The atmosphere at work has been anything but festive.  The hospital is full to bursting and the ER has been extra busy.

In spite of my winter doldrums my doctors are very happy with my progress.  Dr. Jarrett is very pleased with my weight loss.  Dr. Landman, the endocrinologist was so excited and says I barely need her anymore.  I am not taking anything for my diabetes and she is only treating me now for hypothyroidism.  I don't have to go back to her for six months.  I go for my bariatric surgery follow up at the surgeon's office the week after Christmas.  After the New Year I need to pay attention to other areas of my health that I have been neglecting.  I need to see my gynecologist, my dermatologist and my dentist.

Losing 100 pounds in six months is nothing to shrug off however.  I continue to marvel at how much better I feel now than I did last year.  I'm a different person. I have less "insulation" now so I have to dress a little warmer.  I've been wearing the coat I used to save for when the temperature went down to zero.  It hasn't gotten lower than ten degrees yet!

Stay warm everyone!

Love,
Marlena of Mohegan
 

100 POUNDS OF ME ARE GONE!!!!!

Yay!!!!!!!

I was hoping to reach this milestone for Christmas and I got there with ten days to spare.  I am so aware of how much better I feel now than I did six months ago.

I can't be complacent though because I know this is a lifetime battle.  Since eating my lunch doesn't take my whole lunch break I thought I'd do some walking.  During the cold weather though I don't want to walk outside.  I decided to do stairs.  I walked up two flights of stairs today and my heart rate went up to about 130.  I sat for a couple of minutes then went down in the elevator to have my lunch.  (My knee hurts more going down stairs than up.)  I'll just have to keep doing this until I can run all the way up to the fifth floor.  A friend suggested that I set a fitness goal as well as a weight loss goal.  Thanks for the idea Heather! 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

T'was the night...

T'was the night before Christmas when all through the house,
the calories were lurking all ready to pounce.
There are cookies for Santa placed out on a plate.
I might take a nibble if the sleigh arrives late.

On the Christmas tree we'd hung striped candy canes
I feel my resistance is starting to wane.
The stockings are bulging with goodies galore
Who dropped holiday M&M's on the floor?

We strung some popcorn to hang on the tree
For every kernel used I think I ate three. 
Do I see a big golden box from Godiva?
I'm starting to drool from too much saliva. 

The fridge is stocked with egg nog and more
to be ready for friends who'll come through the door.
A turkey for dinner and pies for dessert
Plus munchies for noshing to keep us alert.

I'll need my strength for the big day ahead
I'd better stop snacking and get up to bed.
For the kids wake up early to unwrap their stuff
And everyone eats much more than enough. 

So to all, who like me, must put on the brakes
And say no to all the candies and cakes.
The best part of Christmas is not what we swallow
but warm family hugs and the kisses that follow.

Cleaning out the closet

Today I filled two plastic garbage bags with clothes that are too large for me to wear anymore.  I'll be taking them to a Good Will bin and get rid of them.  You'd think I'd have more room in the closet now but my husband doesn't think so.  He's always complaining that I have too many clothes, shoes, purses etc.  He doesn't understand how anyone could need more than three pairs of shoes (work shoes, dress shoes and sneakers). Of course if I bring up the subject of all he has in the basement, the garage and two sheds he replies that every bit of his stuff is critical for the maintenance of the house. 

It did feel good to get rid of the big clothes though.  It is nice to wear something that was once snug and find it is very roomy.  Eventually though it begins to look ridiculous and has to go.  Fortunately I am still able to find wearable clothes in the back of my closet.  I have a stretchy black velvet dress that I wear for choral concerts.  It is a wonderful dress because it never looks wrinkled even if I forget to hang it up.  I was still able to wear it at my largest weight.  Now, however, it still looks good but has gotten a lot longer!  (I guess I'll have to give it up when it starts dragging on the floor.) 

I'm looking forward to the after holiday sales to get some bargains for clothing that I plan to wear for this winter only.  I plan on being a lot thinner next winter.

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Surviving Thanksgiving

Well, the first of the big food holidays is past.  I did most of the cooking even though I initially said I wouldn't.  I mean really, is it fair for someone who only eats a golf ball-sized portion to spend all day cooking?  Actually, when I compare my kitchen stamina with previous years I was able to do a lot more.  My family loves my stuffing.  I have to admit it was delicious.  

When dinnertime came I had some dark turkey meat, small bits of mashed potatoes and stuffing with some gravy.  When everyone was eating their pie I had some sugar free popsicles.  I felt satisfied but not overstuffed like everyone else.  I certainly didn't have turkey narcosis from the L-tryptophan.

More than anything on this day of thanks I was able to focus on the joy of being with my loved ones and thankfulness for a better chance to be around to enjoy them for a longer time. 

I hope all my readers had a wonderful Thanksgiving and will have a joyous holiday season in the next few weeks.  

Love to all, 

Marlena of Mohegan

Gee, I wonder...

Gastrointestinally speaking I have not had a great week.  First, I had a visit from Chuck.  I thought Chuck had forgotten me.  For dinner the other night I had a fish fillet and some broccoli.  Now the broccoli was well cooked but I guess I didn't chew it carefully enough. It took about five rounds with Chuck to get myself unclogged.  I think maybe broccoli and I are no longer friends as it has caused me problems before this. 

That was not the end of my GI troubles.  The lower end had some adventures too.  I will spare my readers the gruesome details.  It is enough to say that on two different days I had events that required great urgency.  Neither of these near disasters happened at home however.  One was at church and one at work.  I was able to manage the episode at church on my own.  At work I was not so lucky.  Fortunately a special coworker of mine came to my rescue and helped me extricate myself from the situation gracefully. 

I thought I might've had an attack of the dreaded Dumping Syndrome because I had eaten a graham cracker shortly before the episode at work.  It turned out not to be the case as I continued to have symptoms for the next 36 hours. 

Tonight, or rather this morning, I went to the midnight showing of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 1.  We arrived at the theater about 90 minutes before the show in order to get good seats.  The movie was 2 hours and 40 minutes long.  I don't remember my bottom feeling so sore from sitting that long in a movie.  I guess it must be because my bottom isn't as well padded as it used to be.  Ah, well.  I'll just bring an extra cushion next time. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Did you kiss a veteran today?

Tonight I took my favorite veteran, my husband of 26 and1/2 years, out to dinner.  Applebees had a special free meal for veterans and current members of the armed forces.  The place was packed.  We had to wait an hour for a table but we met a lovely Scottish lady who kept us entertained.  She was quite a character. 

We had a nice dinner but our server kept asking me if everything was ok.  Finally she asked if there was something wrong with my dinner because I'd hardly touched it.  I explained that I'd had stomach surgery and I could only eat a small portion.  I assured her the  meal was fine and I planned to take the rest home for my lunch tomorrow. 

I had chosen an entree from several that Applebees offers that are Weight Watcher approved.  In NY all restaurants are required to list calorie counts for everything on the menu.  Even before my surgery I was less likely to order a dessert that had a calorie count over 1000 calories per serving.  Now, of course, I don't even think about dessert at all. 

So lovely to go out to eat and not feel guilty about anything!!

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

Onward to the holidays!

Today was my grandson Lorenzo's first birthday.  We had a big party at home and naturally there was lots of food.  I had a few more carbs than usual but I was able to resist birthday cake with ease.  It amazes me to think of all the food we consume  in social situations merely because we think we are expected to eat it.  Nobody minded that I did not eat cake.  There are occasions when we do get pressured to eat something though.

I once had a boyfriend with whom I visited his grandmother on Sunday evenings.  She was Irish but would always fix us Pirogi which for those who don't know is a Polish dish similar to ravioli stuffed with potato, cheese, sauerkraut or all three.  There was always more than we wanted to eat.  Usually for dessert she would give us a dish of chocolate chip ice cream with a side of green jello.  She would start pressuring us if we didn't finish all she prepared.  She would start telling us that she didn't have money to waste and she bought this food especially for us.  Then she would lament that she could not eat all this food herself so we were breaking her heart. 

Other food persuaders might not use the same strategy as grandma did but we all have trouble saying no to friends who make us something special when we come over to dinner.  We don't want to insult anyone's cooking. 

I went to an Italian wedding once where the food started out around 4 pm at the cocktail hour..  There was a huge buffet with more than enough to be called dinner.  The rest of the food was served over the next eight hours.  It didn't seem like a lot of food as each course was graciously  and individually served.  We never felt overly full, just pleasantly satisfied.  My date and I left at midnight although the party showed no sign of winding down.  When we stopped to think of how much food we had eaten during the whole reception we were feeling quite guilty. 

It is so unlike me to be strong in the face of temptation.  I hope I can sustain my resistance to sugar-laden goodies.  I am not even halfway to my weight loss goal.  Before weight loss surgery patients are counseled to expect some periods of depression and feeling of loss.  I have not felt that way yet.  I do miss my morning egg-Mcmuffin and I always seem to hear a McDonald's breakfast commercial on the radio just as I'm driving past McD's on my way to work.  But I have broken the habit of stopping there.  The only thing I ever buy there now is bottled water. 

So as the holidays loom ever closer (at the department stores they're already here) I feel strong yet cautious about all the temptations ahead.

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

On Halloween Eve I bought a new broom!

Don't worry, I'm not planning to ride the broom tonight.  Here I am on the first chocolate holiday of the year.  I've had nary a Junior Mint.  I have not tried even one piece of candy since my surgery.  There was that fortune cookie I ate a couple of months ago but that's the closest thing I've had. 

Oh, you say, you've never heard of the chocolate holidays?  I invented the term to describe all holidays for which there is a chocolate candy specifically made for that day.  Naturally there are no chocolate holidays in the summer because of the hot weather.  So Halloween starts off the season which includes Thanksgiving (foil covered turkeys), Hanukkah (chocolate  gelt coins), Christmas for chocolate Santas, Valentines Day and Easter.  Mother's day marks the end of the season not for specific Mother's day treats but just because so many of us get a box of candy when the kids can't think of anything else to buy.  There are now colored M&M's and festively wrapped Hershey Kisses for most of these holidays too.

You must have surmised by now that I am a chocoholic.  I admit it.  I'm in recovery though.  I have not cheated because of the threat of the dreaded dumping syndrome.  I have had chocolate protein powder and protein drinks.  There is sugar free Nestle's Quik for chocolate milk, sugar free fudgesicles and chocolate sugar free pudding.  I've also had sugar free hot cocoa since the weather has turned colder. 

I don't know why I could never have had this strength of will before my surgery.  I've had too many years of chocolate overload.  This year I handed out candy to the trick or treaters and did not even try to smell a candy bar.  It didn't kill me.  It didn't even hurt.  I can do this thing.  I feel great.

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Bless my blog.

It's been a long time since I posted anything.  I'm finding that now that I'm back among the working again I am no longer the last one to go to bed in my house.  I liked the solitude of 2am to think and write.  In the evening competition for the computer is at its peak. 

I've been reminded of something I found out a long, long time ago.  Losing weight can make you feel better and live better.  Your life, however, is still your same life.  There are still bills, frustrations and the common cold.  Some days my job just sucks. 

We all seem to think that if only we were thinner, blonder, richer or had a smaller nose everything would be better.   This became very obvious to me the first time I lost a significant amount of weight.  I was 21.  I lost 72 lbs. and thinner than I'd ever been.  Some friends and I were driving to a party one night and on the way another car ran into us.  There were no serious injuries but we were stranded about sixty miles from home.  It was my first car accident and I was really upset that my car was wrecked.  Things worked out all right.  We got a ride home and my car was not a total loss.  When I got it back from the body shop it was as good as new.  I learned that night that thin people don't have a monopoly on happiness. 

On a more positive note, I am down nearly 80 pounds.  Doing my job is a million times easier than it was before I had my surgery.  Even though my work is very stressful at least I don't stress about basic things like breathing.  It's wonderful. 

I'm finding lots of clothes in my closet that I can wear now.  I've had to throw out a big bag of clothing that was too big!  Yeah!  Its great! 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

I'm having a busy week

Since this is my second week back at work and also opera "Hell Week", I haven't spent much time blogging.  I have to admit that the night they started bringing the trapped miners in Chile up to the surface I was up after midnight watching the second miner come out.  It was really terrific.  He brought up some small rocks in a bag and passed out some copper ore to the President of Chile and a few others.  I thought that was a very upbeat thing to do.  It's amazing when the whole world is watching something positive.  It was wonderful to see. 

As for the opera, we are finished with rehearsals.  We have performances on Friday and Saturday nights and Sunday afternoon.  I'm holding up pretty well.  Our last production I had difficulty moving while singing.  I had to make sure I got to the backstage area well before my entrances so that I wouldn't be out of breath when I went on.  I could never have managed working and performing in the same day. 

I passed Dr,. Choi in a hospital hallway the other day.  She said I'm looking great.  I do feel great most of the time.  I've had some back spasms a couple of times.  I don't know what that's about.  Naturally it would be impossible for me to be completely pain-free for any length of time.  I still have arthritis flare ups when the weather is bad. 

I'm managing my meals and snacks with this busy week.  I made a yummy protein shake tonight.  Chocolate flavored protein powder with frozen unsweetened dark cherries with a little sugar free chocolate syrup with milk.  It was almost like eating chocolate covered cherries. 

Many kudos to Amanda, my daughter for feeding the family when I'm so busy.  Love you!

And love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan.

I made it.

I survived my first week back at work.  The first day was exhausting though.  I fell asleep that night in the middle of Dancing With The Stars!  The next day was better and by Friday it felt like I'd never left.  It felt incredibly good to be able to work without gasping for breath like I did before. 

In addition to working I had rehearsals for Tosca two nights this week and also Saturday.  Next week is our "Hell Week" which means rehearsals every night then three performances on the weekend. 

As you can see I've jumped right into the fire!  Of course the holidays are not far off so I will continue to be busy, busy, busy.  I am back with the living and glad to be back. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Back to the real world

Tomorrow morning I am back on the job full time.  I feel so much healthier than I did six months ago.  Back then I could barely walk down the hallway without tachycardia and shortness of breath.  Even walking at a very slow pace was too much.  I truly could not perform my work to my satisfaction.  My patients noticed my breathing and asked if I was OK.  I don't think a person having a myocardial infarction should have to worry about their nurse's breathing. 

My family, coworkers and friends have been so supportive of my efforts.  Some of my coworkers even had to care for me when I was an ER patient.  Thanks to you all for your love and support.  My journey is not over nor will it ever be completely finished.  My quest for a healthy body will last for the rest of my life.  I have to look at it that way because I am not on a "diet" that will end one day. 

Now all I have to do is make myself go to sleep at a reasonable hour so I can wake up by 6 am!

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

That's more like it.

Yesterday I had my three month checkup at Dr. Choi's office.  I also saw the dietician and weighed in on the official scale.  My total loss is now 67 pounds.  So my plan to deal with the plateau seems to have worked.  Everything seems to be good but the PA said that now is the time that I might notice some hair loss.  I have been keeping up with my protein which lowers the risk of losing my hair.  I hope it works. 

I started using fitday.com for keeping track of my food/nutirient intake.  It is a good site but I wish they had a way to keep track of fluids too. 

The next chapter of my journey begins on Monday when I go back to work. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Back to the job.

Today I was cleared by employee health to return to my job.  I feel so much better than I did six months ago.  I'm sure it will be challenging to readjust to my old routine.  When I went out on medical leave I could not walk down the hallway without getting short of breath.  Today I walked around the place and felt ready to be back.  I'm so glad that I had my weight loss surgery.  I was dying, literally.  I had chronic congestive heart failure and was unable to do anything strenuous at all. 

I made a new page with a few pictures before and after.  I'll add more as I keep losing. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

OH NO! A PLATEAU!

I did not have support group this week because it was last week.  Funny how the third Wednesday of the month was the 15th.  It seemed too early to me.  So I didn't get to go this time.  It was my son's birthday anyway so I certainly wanted to spend the evening with my family.

Today I needed to pick up something from the pharmacy so I stopped by the "official scale"  and found that I'd only lost one pound since the last time I weighed.  Now after that I stopped by work to pick up the schedule since I'm going back on Oct. 4th.  I got lots of hugs and everyone thought I looked great.  When we got back into the car, my daughter asked if all the strokes to my ego made up for the plateau.  My hesitation to answer prompted her to say that when my coworkers were fussing over me the smile on my face wouldn't have come off with Ajax and a wire brush.  OK I admit it. It did help. Onward through the plateau.

Now any veteran dieter will tell you that these happen to everyone who tries to lose weight.  Our bodies have noticed that our lovely fat cells are shrinking.  The metabolism goes into panic mode and lowers itself so that the grip on those precious fat cells becomes tighter.  As annoying as this might seem it does account for survival in times of actual famine.  Should you find yourself on a desert island somewhere you will want your body to hang on to all its resources until the rescue boat arrives.  That being said the strategy here is to fool the body into loosening up.

I can remember those weigh-ins at Weight Watchers.  At the end of the meeting the leader would announce how much everyone lost that week even though it might be as little as a quarter of a pound.  (They would tactfully skip those who gained.  No humiliation there)  Once a lecturer brought a stick of butter to a meeting to show us what a quarter of a pound looks like.  It may not be much but wouldn't you rather not have that stick of butter on your hips?  At the time I first did Weight Watchers they were not really stressing exercise.  Their solution to the plateau was to stick with their usual program being really precise about weighing and measuring your food.  Also make sure you drink eight glasses of water every day without fail. The water is supposed to flush out the fat.  Well that old fat does exit through the plumbing.  (It certainly doesn't disappear in a puff of smoke.)

When I was doing the Phen-Fen my doctor told me to combat a stall by increasing my exercise and thus kicking up my metabolism. It sounded good but I really didn't try this back then.  

A blogger I follow said she overcame her plateau by upping her protein intake.  She found a new protein powder that she really liked which helped her accomplish this.

Another idea I heard recently was to eat more calories every third (or was it fifth) day to show your body that it really isn't starving.   I did try this but it was too easy to eat more every day. 

My plan is to incorporate all of these recommendations except for that last one..  I will go back to keeping track of all my nutrients and fluids every day to make sure I'm getting enough of everything.  I need to get to the gym too.  Since I'm heading back to the job I will have more activity anyway. 

So here I am still 60 pounds lighter than I was on June 28th.  The fall season is a time when mammals tend to increase weight for the coming winter.  I'm not going there. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan.

Whoops! My eyes ARE bigger than my belly.

My mother used to tell me this when I was a child.  I didn't like hearing it then and I didn't much like it last night  when my husband noticed I did not finish my chicken.  I didn't think  I took too much but eventually Chuck paid me a visit. 

I've found that I prefer to eat semi-liquid food like yogurt because it doesn't back up like solid food can.  Solids require more chewing and a slower pace.  I have not mastered either of these yet. 

I have another support group coming up today.  I will check my weight on the official scale while I'm there.  Meanwhile, I'll try not to "bite off more than I can chew". 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Two birthday cakes and one Chinese Buffet

We had two birthdays in the family this week.  I sailed through them with no guilt!  For my son's he wanted baked manicotti, of which I was able to eat the cheesy filling, and ice cream cake which isn't a big temptation for me.  Two days later was my mother's birthday.  We went to a nearby Chinese buffet where I had egg drop soup, a small amount of pepper chicken with vegetables, two steamed clams and some melon for dessert.  When the check came I opened my fortune cookie to read it and popped the cookie in my mouth without even thinking about it.  Fortunately (ha ha) fortune cookies are not too sweet so I did not have any bad side effects.  We went back to the house for cake.  Now the cake was a luscious looking devil's food with chocolate buttercream frosting.  Normally this would be a MAJOR temptation for me.  However, I was pretty full from dinner so there was no way I could cram any cake in my pouch.  Later I had a few of my sugar-free popsicles.  Only 15 calories each and I am addicted to the tropical flavored ones. 

Normally these two events would have meant ingesting thousands of unnecessary calories.  I am happy to say that I am not feeling sorry for myself.  I had a good time without overeating.  I have not paid a visit to the "official scale"  for a while so I need to check on my progress.  I have a support group meeting on Wednesday so I'll weigh in then.  In the meantime I have some opera to memorize before Friday's staging rehearsal.  Tosca awaits me!

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Still a long way to go

When people are able to notice that I have lost weight it becomes like a drug.  I hear loads of compliments and I revel in the feeling of success.  This past weekend I got together with a bunch of friends who haven't seen me for several years.  They were all very happy that I looked so much better than the last time they saw me.

Two of the friends had come for a vacation in NY from the west coast.  On Monday they planned to do some sightseeing including a boat tour of some historic sites.  I asked if I could tag along since I have missed going to Manhattan.  I have been able to get around walking so much better than before my surgery I was pretty confident that I could manage to negotiate those sidewalks of NY like I used to do. 

Monday morning I took the train to Grand Central Station then the subway to the Wall Street area.  I walked past "Ground Zero" and went a few blocks to their hotel.  So far, so good.  We then walked over to the South Street Seaport and got our tickets for the boat.  We had to wait about 40 minutes for the boat but it was a glorious sunny day and there is so much to see just sitting there.  The boat ride lasted about an hour and afterward my friends wanted to go back to the hotel for a little bit.  I had wanted to go to Chinatown so we split up and planned to meet at Times Square later for dinner.

My knees were beginning to bother me at this point.  I caught a bus to Canal Street and set off to do some shopping.  Walking was becoming more uncomfortable by this time.  I couldn't find the part of Chinatown that has the stores that cater to tourists.  Instead I was in an area that was more like actually being in China.  I saw lots of fish and produce for sale but no "designer" handbags, watches or souvenirs.  I found a bench and sat for a while but when I began to walk again I seemed to be going in circles and still didn't find where I wanted to be.  Increasingly tired and sore I decided to give up and head for Times Square.  I got on a very crowded bus up to midtown but I was still over on the east side with quite a way to walk to Broadway and 42nd St.  I hailed a cab to ride the rest of the way.  By this time it was getting cloudy and while we were at dinner it began to rain.  Perhaps my arthritis was aggravated by the weather but I was finished sightseeing.  After going in the wrong direction for a block I walked slowly back to Grand Central Station and caught my train.  I could have taken the Times Square shuttle to Grand Central but I just couldn't see where the subway entrance was.  I was exhausted and really sore by the time I got home.

I had a blast with my friends in the city but I was blatantly reminded that I still have a long, long way to go.  I've lost 60 pounds but my goal is to lose 165 more.  All the compliments made forget this.  I'm better than I was but I'm not thin yet.

On a good note, I did have success with restaurant meals over the weekend and Monday.  I was able to eat just enough without any problems.  One day we went to Oktoberfest.  At that event I shared part of my husband's meal.  Another time about 25 of us met at a local diner.  While there, I ordered an appetizer, ate just enough for me and brought the rest home.  We went to an Italian restaurant in the city.  The food there was served family style so I could control my portions easily.  I'm learning when to stop eating to avoid any pouch discomfort. 

I had a wonderful time with my friends from my youth.  We all show some signs of wear and tear but we can still have a good time. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

Catching up

I see its been over a week since I posted.  I appreciate the encouraging comments from my friends.  They really help! 

This week I had an appointment with the nurse practitioner at the endocrinology office.  My A1C is 6.9!  That is without any diabetic medication at all.  Prior to my surgery my A1C was 7.6 and was taking four injections of insulin daily and an oral medication twice a day.  I was weighed on their scale (which of course was not the official scale at Dr. Choi's office).  According to their scale I am down nearly 60 pounds. 

I have been trying to eat new things.  I did make egg salad which went down very well.  I found that my little 10 month old grandson likes egg salad too.  Nobody can eat in front of him without sharing.  He makes everyone feel very guilty if they don't.  I'm still striving to eat slowly and stop before I take in too much.  I finished the nasty tasting liquid vitamins (YAY) and went back to the chewables with good results.  I'm swallowing all my pills whole with no problems.  We are on the verge of being flooded with tomatoes from the garden.  YUM! 

Today I went for a walk with my daughter and my grandson.  She was pleasantly surprised to find that I can keep up with her without getting short of breath.  The last time we went walking I kept having to ask her to slow down.  My knee is feeling better.  I do have some hip pain which is probably due to arthritis.  Hopefully that will be better with less weight. 

I will be returning to work in about three weeks.  That will be a big challenge for several reasons.  I have not been getting up early for a long, long time.  I need to figure out what to take for lunch.  Things are always changing at work so I'll have to catch up.  I look forward to being able to do my job better now because I'm healthier. 

It's September 11th.  I will never forget that day nine years ago.  I pray for comfort to those who lost loved ones that day.  I also pray for peace.  May we all learn to love each other in spite of our differences because we all are children of God. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

The official scale says....52 pounds lighter

My clothes are loose, I fit better in the driver's seat of my car and I feel like my arms are getting longer. 
By that last one I mean that I can scratch places on my back that I couldn't reach before.  In addition, since there is less of me in front, I can reach into my kitchen cabinets more easily. 

I am still trying to eat slowly but don't always succeed.  I've long been someone who likes hot food hot.  I like steam coming off the platter and don't want to let everything get cold. 

I am also getting into a rut with my food intake.  Most commonly I eat Greek yogurt with additions like protein powder, fruit or other flavoring, low fat cheese and sugar free popsicles.  I have an egg once in a while and I've had some turkey salad which I made from canned turkey.  I have started to eat some of what my family eats for dinner.  Sometimes that works well, sometimes not.  The yummy looking recipes I have seen on other blogs are tempting but seem like such a lot of trouble for the quantity I can eat.  Maybe tomorrow I'll make some egg salad for a change of pace. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan

No more Clean Plate Club

It is time to withdraw my membership from the Clean Plate Club.  In this first week of non-pureed food I've learned one very important thing.  I have to stop eating before I'm too full.  The amount still on my plate is totally irrelevant.  This concept is so alien to what I learned as a small child.  Perhaps being raised by family who had survived The Great Depression inspired the habit of not wasting a morsel of food.  I usually retain any leftovers in my fridge until they are eaten or rediscovered much too late to be consumed. 

Early last week my family ordered take-out Chinese food.  Feeling adventurous, I ordered some shrimp egg foo yung.  I ate a portion about the size of an Oreo cookie and was quite full.  I put the rest in the fridge and had a little every day for lunch or supper.  After six days of egg foo yung there was still plenty left in the container.  I just couldn't face any more (probably would not be safe much longer anyway) and threw the rest away.  Needless to say, I have to find something smaller to order from the Chinese menu. 

Today I had some of my daughter's yummy meatloaf.  I put a piece about the size of a marshmallow on my plate with some of the low-fat gravy and about a tablespoon of mashed potatoes.  I didn't think it was too much but sure enough the pouch was full before the plate was empty.  I'm in a whole new world. 

Love you,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

STEP FIVE, foodwise that is.

I have finally reached the end of the pureed stage and am now allowed to begin chewing my food again.  Naturally I am not supposed to go directly to Outback Steak House and order the big sirloin.  I have learned that even though I am eating only a couple of tablespoons of food I need to make my meals last for 25 minutes.  This gives me time to chew thoroughly.  Also by eating slowly I give myself time to recognize when fullness sets in.  I have regretted having too much in my little pouch since this leads to a visit from my old buddy Chuck!. 

Many years ago, when I first went to Weight Watchers, I remember hearing that it takes 20 minutes to recognize when one's stomach is full.  It is not hard to go way past merely satisfying hunger to overeating before the 20 minute warning.  Ah, the story of my life. 

In addition to eating slowly, I am not supposed to drink liquids until 30 minutes after my meals.  This is supposed to keep the pouch from emptying too quickly.  Actually if I try to drink too soon I find that my feeling of fullness becomes uncomfortable and may risk losing my meal (that Chuck again)  An overfull pouch feels very different from that overstuffed, post-Thanksgiving,, unbuttoning your waistband, oops I did it again feeling.  Instead I feel like I've swallowed a fist-sized rock. 

So, as you can see, I have a lot of behavior modification to do.  Since I am eating such a small volume of food I can't afford empty calories.  I've been having quite a few sugar-free popsicles during the hot summer weather.  They are yummy but don't have any nutrients.  I need to make the small meals count.  I have been adding my protein powder to yogurt and sugar-free pudding.  I also made eggnog in my blender with Egg Beaters, milk and the protein powder.  I need to get the fat-free half and half for the next time I do it so it will be thicker.  It was pretty good except I overdid the nutmeg. 

Enjoy the fleeting summer while you can.  It will be fall before we know it. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

The World according to Eggface

I have to share this blog with anyone who would like some creative eating ideas.  This woman is the Martha Stewart of post-op bariatric surgery.  She has amazing recipes and suggestions.  I think she should publish a cookbook.  Even if you are not part of the bariatric community, her ideas for healthy, protein-enhanced eating are both innovative and delicious.  
 So check it out and enjoy! 




http://theworldaccordingtoeggface.blogspot.com/

Support group

On Wednesday I went to my first Bariatric Surgery Support Group meeting since I had my operation.  We had a presentation about drinking sufficient fluids.  Then we were encouraged to mingle and those of us who were post-op were able to share experiences with pre-op patients.  It was good to hear from some of the post-ops who were several years out and had tremendous success.  I also got some hints about sneaking extra protein in my diet.

I don't know why I had only thought of drinking the protein supplements.  Sprinkle a scoop or two of protein powder in with some instant sugar-free pudding.  DOH!  How easy is that?  Last night I added a scoop with fresh ricotta cheese and a little sugar free apricot jam.  I felt like I was eating cheesecake!!

We were given some samples of True Lemon and encouraged to put it in a bottle of water.  It was pretty good.  I'm a little concerned because the second ingredient is "evaporated cane juice"  which sounds to me like SUGAR.  However, I tried it and didn't have any unpleasant side effects (like dumping syndrome which can happen after eating sugar).  It was also suggested sprinkling it on chicken or fish.  Not a bad idea.

The meeting was held at the Dept. of Surgery waiting area.  I went in to the OFFICIAL scale and the new total is 45 lbs lost!  YAY!!!

Best wishes to everyone.  If you are considering the surgery I would like to say that I am thrilled that I did this.  I was really ready and committed.  If you need a little more time to decide that's ok.  You want to be sure.

Love,
Marlena of Mohegan.

Of course it would turn out this way.

On my last post I was thrilled to have liquid vitamin and calcium supplements rather than the chewable sludge-producing tablets.  I figured that the liquid vitamins tasted like those children's vitamins I remembered.  Polyvisol mmmmm.  No such luck..  Both supplements are pretty nasty tasting.  At least they percolate through my stomach without a visit from Chuck. 

In a week I'll be officially finished with the pureed stage.  Yay!!  I'm looking forward to chewing again.  After the experience with the vitamins I know I'll have to start with pretty soft food and chew really well.  I'm sure I won't be ready for steak. 

People who did not know about my surgery are noticing that I'm thinner.  This part of weight loss is like a drug..  When people notice and say "Wow!  You look fantastic!"  It's hard not to get on an ego trip.  I've got a long way to go so I can't get complacent.  What I can do though is go through my closet and throw away things I can no longer wear.  YEAH!

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan.

Chuck, get lost!

I decided yesterday that I would start taking my supplements again.  I had survived a week without Chuck rearing his ugly head.  I chewed up one of the calcium supplements before eating my lunch.  Either I didn't chew it enough or else the pieces form sediment in my stomach.  My lunch soon left me.  Later that night I took two more of the calcium supplements and the multivitamin.  I didn't eat afterwards but I did drink water.  I didn't have any problems this time.  I guess I will have to make sure they are flushed through before I eat anything else. 

HOWEVER, today at my pharmacy I picked up some liquid vitamins and liquid Calcium with Vitamin D!  Yeah!  Now all I have to worry about is the larger of my blood pressure pills and the ursodiol.  I just use my pill splitter on them. 

In only ten days I will be moving on from the puree stage to soft foods.  I will still have to limit carbs and keep my protein intake high.  It will be nice though to have the same dinner as my family again.

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan.

40 POUNDS LIGHTER!

I was in the neighborhood of my surgeon's office today and I stopped it to weigh in on the "official scale".  I was delighted to see that I am 40.3 pounds lighter than I was on June 28th, a mere six weeks ago. 

We had a visit this past weekend from a family member whom I hadn't seen in four years.  She said she saw in my face that I had changed.  Not only my weight but a "spark" which had been missing for a long time.  I agree, my overall outlook on life is so much brighter than before (especially now that the vomiting problem has been resolved). 

I had my third and final injection of Supartz in my knee today.  It has been less sore when I'm walking or doing leg exercises at the gym.  It should continue to improve over the next month. 

I am wearing Sketchers "Shape-up"  shoes for walking.  Reportedly they improve the alignment of my spine and are less stressful to knees.  I love them.  I feel very energetic when walking in them.  There was a little adjustment period because the motion of the foot is a little different than in regular sneakers.  Now it feels very natural. 

Have a great week,
love,
Marlena of Mohegan

Feeling good.

Today I had an egg!!!  It was wonderful!  I've always been one of those "If it ain't eggs it ain't breakfast"  kind of person.  I was supposed to wait two weeks after starting pureed food to have eggs in any form.  I have been obeying the rules since day one.  The two weeks would have ended three days from now but I went to hell today.  I cooked an egg in some Smart Balance margarine.  I chopped up the white part really small and left the yolk intact.  I served it to myself in one of my egg cups.  It tasted heavenly.  I savored each mouthful and truly enjoyed myself. 

If you have never seen or heard of an egg cup you can check out my page where I have posted some pictures from my collection. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

Let's see if this works.

Yesterday, Thursday, I had my upper endoscopy.  Dr. B. said the outlet from my new stomach was too narrow for the scope to fit through.  The diameter was 10 millimeters.  With a balloon, he dilated it to 16 mm.  Hopefully this will allow the pills to progress further than before.  He said I might need another dilation at some point.  I am very happy to find out that I had an obstruction rather than a psychological problem.  Hopefully this will put an end to my problems with chuck (you know who he is by now). 

I also have a resolve to SLOW DOWN when I eat.  I've been a rapid eater for a long time partly because I'm lucky if I even get lunch at work let alone linger over it.  I am not a morning person either.  On my way out of the house in the morning my routine was to throw the handful of pills down my throat as I'm rushing out the door.  I'd grab an Egg McMuffin and a Diet Coke at you-know-where and eat in the car.  All of this is not going to work anymore.

I saw a quote from Jean Nidetch, the founder of Weight Watchers, Inc. "Overweight people never let go of their fork. They hold it when they are talking. They hold it when they are chewing. I discovered that is one of the secrets. Let go of the instrument that made you fat"  Its true, we do not place the fork down on the plate and carefully chew and savor each mouthful.  If I have paraphrased this idea in a previous blog entry, please forgive me.  It certainly bears repeating. 

I am about to take some of my pills for the first time in a week.  Wish me luck.  I have to say though that my blood pressure was pretty darn good even if I haven't had my medication.  I'm gonna ask my doctor if maybe I can eliminate one of my blood pressure pills. 

Love to all,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

Getting to the bottom of the problem.

On Thursday I am having my upper endoscopy to find out what the heck is going on down there.  I had a couple of more episodes with chuck (you know UP-chuck).  I've tried grinding up my pills with a marble mortar and pestle yet!  Unfortunately the taste of some of my pills is so incredibly bad that even if mixed with applesauce it is hard not to gag.  I'm someone who never had trouble with pills before this. 

Yesterday I made a recipe that was similar to one from the blog "The world according to egg-face"  I mixed one cup of fat free ricotta cheese, one beaten egg and 1/4 cup of freshly grated parmesan cheese.   I baked it in a pyrex custard cup for about 25 minutes.  It was the most adorable thing.  It looked like a muffin but in reality was a mini cheese souffle.  It was delicious.  Unfortunately, egg-face's recipe also used some tomato sauce and probably came out more like a crustless calzone.  The texture of mine was a little too much for me and it got stuck.  OH, well. 

I got my second Supartz injection in my knee on Monday.  One more next week and that's all. 

Today I actually got the love of my life, my husband of twenty-six years, to the doctor for a physical.  Since I'm planning on living a lot longer I thought it would be a good idea to get him tuned up so he'll be around too. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

Back to PLANET FITNESS!!!

I finally dragged my butt back to the gym.  I did my same circuit that a good fitness friend set up for me last year.    I had to modify the lower body weights because my left knee is still a little tender.  Lower weight and more reps are better for the circulation.  But it felt good to be doing this again.  I plan to go three times per week.  My workout takes about 20-30 minutes.  On the days I don't go to the gym I'll do my walking. 

I'm still having trouble with my pills.  The NP at Dr. Choi's office told me not to take any of the big pills for now.  Fine by me.  I had about 3 hours of vomiting today but I was able to clear the problem without a trip to the ER!! YAY!!! 
Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

There seems to be a pattern here.

Last Monday I was in the ER.  I did ok for the next three days and then on Friday I was at the ER again.  The weekend and yesterday were fine.  Today I was in a hurry to get out of the house and rushed my pills.  I threw up all day and finally drove myself to the ER and got another IV.  I did not, however, get another CT scan.  Two in a weeks time was enough. 

Eventually I felt better, after some Reglan in my IV, and I went home.  Tomorrow though, I will be making an appointment for an upper endoscopy to see if there is something amiss down there that doesn't show up on CT.  I definitely had some pill fragments today.  I think I will be crushing all my pills from now on.  I plan to soak them a little before I take them.  Maybe a little milk or applesauce will soften them up if I let it sit for a while.  Its hard enough to get all my protein and fluids ingested without these setbacks. 

 My left knee has been a little sore so I saw my orthopedist today and got an injection of Supartz (synthetic joint fluid).  I've used similar products before with great success.  I get a second injection in a week and another the week after that.  Usually the knee feels great for six months to a year afterward.  I know my increased walking aggravated the knee but I want to keep up with my exercise. 

I plan to go to the gym tomorrow.  Dr. Choi said I could do weight training after four weeks.  In spite of the setbacks with the vomiting and the knee I still feel pretty good.  I am trying to be proactive with any problems that arise rather than let myself get debilitated.  I'm still happy I had the surgery and grateful for all the encouragement I've gotten from my doctors, family and friends. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

Back to the ER

Well, I ended up back in the ER last night.  I couldn't keep anything down.  When they gave me the oral contrast this time I couldn't keep that down either.  I kept vomiting over the next hour or so.  I even had to throw up while I was in the scanner and they had to get me out quick.   Finally after the episode in CT I felt better.  I had a negative result of the scan so I was given some juice to drink and it stayed down.  I don't know what keeps going wrong.  Today I'm taking everything in slowly and hopefully I'll get to keep it.

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

Who'd thunk?

Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I'd have trouble eating enough.  I'm still having some difficult episodes.  I've been trying really hard to keep hydrated but I still have difficulty tolerating both food and drink sometimes. 

I used to eat pretty fast.  I could eat something so quickly that I forgot I'd eaten it.  That's right.  I'd bring some cookies over to the computer and ate so absent-mindedly that I'd go looking for them and be surprised that there were no more left.  Not anymore. 

Now I have a spoonful of something and have to wait a few minutes to make sure it stays down.  Sometimes I feel some gurgling and belch a few times after a tiny bit of food.  Some days I have had trouble getting in all my protein and all my fluid. 

Today I crushed my big pills and mixed them with some pudding.  An hour later I drank some Crystal Lite and it didn't stay down.  A little later the same thing happened with water.  Now I'm struggling with applesauce.  I really don't want another trip to the ER.

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

Up, down and all around

The past few days have been rather interesting.  I'll start with Sunday.

I attended a friend's barbecue, my first since the surgery.  I brought a couple of bottles of Glucerna shakes and a bottle of water.  My hostess had thoughtfully bought some sugar free Jell-O cups for me.  I felt like I could handle anything.  There was a lot of food and it all looked wonderful.  I had my Jell-O as I chatted with old friends and made new friends.  I did get a cup of ice from the sno-cone machine (no flavoring).  I found that I really enjoyed the company and could be satisfied with what I had and did not feel like I was missing out on anything.  I had a wonderful time.

And then there was Monday.  In the morning, I had another episode of the pill getting stuck.  I had used my pill splitter to make smaller pieces but it didn't work for me.  After a couple of bouts with chuck, (you know, UP-chuck)  I tried laying down as I had done on Saturday.   When I got up a couple of hours later I took one sip of V8 juice and knew I was in trouble.  I had pain in my stomach and that one sip did not go anywhere.  A few more rounds with chuck and I did not feel any better.  I called Dr. Choi and she told me to go to the ER.

I managed to get to the ER without any episodes of you-know-what in the car.  I felt a little better when I got there but still had some pain.  Well, the ER, the one I work at, was really hopping.  Just before we arrived there was a Trauma Alert.  There were two head-on crashes with a total of seven victims.  To the untrained eye it probably appeared out of control.  To me, it looked like a typical, crazy summer evening.

Anyway, I ended up with an IV, blood tests and a CT scan.  I was given some medication for the vomiting.  When you get a CT scan of the abdomen oral contrast is given and then there is a wait time for the fluid to percolate through your body.  It was near midnight when I had my scan.  On my way back to my curtained cubicle I heard some yelling about a bat.  Sure enough, a poor misguided bat was circling around the nurses station.  Naturally this did not add any serenity to the already chaotic atmosphere.  Somehow the bat was herded away while I waited for my results.  As it turned out my scan was fine, I felt better and went home.  I'd had a liter of fluid in the IV.  I had been feeling pretty dry.  My friends at the ER took good care of me and it was good to see everyone.

Tuesday was the day of my long-anticipated follow-up visit with Dr. Choi and consult with the dietitian.  I was weighed and found to have lost a total of 29 pounds.  (the scale in the ER had a better reading.  According to that one I've lost 34 pounds but Dr. Choi says that only her scale counts, darn)  Anyway, she told me that the problem with the pills was not because of their size or jagged edges but dehydration.  It has been very hot here and she says if you are not getting enough fluid your esophagus becomes less flexible.   So I have to be a good girl and drink, drink, drink.  She says I'm doing fine otherwise.  I can start going to the gym in another week. 

She also told me that when I felt so bloated after the surgery I was experiencing a normal condition called third-spacing.   The fluid I was given in my IV was not going  in one end and out the other as usual but was soaked up by my tissues thus making me look and feel like the Michelin Man.  After doing a gazillion of these surgeries she has seen this effect over and over. 

After Dr. Choi, I met with the dietitian.  This was exciting because I get to have pureed food now!  I'm so excited.  Tonight I had some garlic hummus!  Later I had some low-fat cheese and some sugar free pudding.  I'm in heaven.

I'm also starting a medication which will, hopefully, prevent me from getting gallstones during the next few months.  (Rapid weight loss causes a greater risk for gall-bladder problems).  The medication comes in a big, huge horse pill.  I know Dr. Choi told me I shouldn't worry about pills getting stuck if I keep hydrated but just in case I bought a pill CRUSHER!  Its merely a little insurance.

Love to all my friends,

Marlena of Mohegan

The first one was TOO big........

This morning I had a little trouble with my pills. You may remember that I am not supposed to swallow anything larger than an M&M candy.  One of my medications, Diovan, is an ovoid shape that is slightly bigger than what I should be swallowing.  Since my discharge from the hospital I have been breaking it in half (rather unevenly I'm afraid) and it has been going down OK.  Some tablets are nicely scored in the center and break in half easily.  Not this one.  One day last week I felt like something got kind of stuck but I could still swallow liquids and I felt better after a while.

Today after I swallowed the big half of the pill I immediately felt discomfort in my stomach.  It was fairly sharp.  I drank some more fluid and waited.  It didn't feel any better after the fluid.  This potentially was a serious problem.  If I could not get the pill to move I would have to go to the hospital and have it removed with endoscopy.  Ultimately it came back up along with everything I'd had to drink.  I still felt discomfort all day and finally took some Mylanta liquid which helped.

Now I have a pill splitter and I plan on making smaller pieces from now on.  I don't want to do that again.

On a good note, yesterday I went to the town track for my walking.  I wanted to know the actual distance I could do.  I went twice around the track for a total of half a mile.  When I first got home from the hospital I could barely walk half a block without becoming exhausted.  I try to do my walking in the evening when it is a little cooler.  Sometimes I have to stop and rest halfway through my walk but I feel a lot better than I did three weeks ago.

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

Check up

I saw Dr. Landman, my endocrinologist today.  I am still not using any insulin at all.  YAY!  She is very happy with me.  I have lost 26 lbs so far.  Not bad for 18 days.  It feels good. 

I found Glucerna shakes in butter pecan flavor.  YUM! 

Another heat wave is headed our way so I have to keep up with my fluids.  I feel like crap if I don't. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

FOOD IS FUEL.....my new mantra

The family was sitting round the TV last night enjoying some chips and other non-nutritive food.  I was a little jealous.  Even my new protein supplements, which aren't too bad (more about them later), are not FUN to eat.  How sad is that?  Food as entertainment.

As human beings we do not only eat with our mouths.  We eat with our eyes, nose and ears.  Japanese cuisine is usually presented artistically to stimulate the eyes as well as the palate.  Indeed, the sound and smell of popping corn,  the homey tableau of the Thanksgiving table and even the snap, crackle and pop of a certain breakfast cereal are essential parts of enjoying the experience of eating.

During this period of liquids only I have had to forgo the sensory pleasures of eating.  I have only hot or cold, salty or artificially sweetened liquids.  Some have been frozen or jelled.  That's it.  If I swallow too much at a time there is some pressure in my stomach.  If I get behind on my volume of fluids, I feel a little woozy.  I try to keep on a simple schedule and write down what I eat each day.  I keep track of carbs, ounces of liquid, protein grams and calories.  I eat from 60-80 grams of protein per day and roughly 500 calories.  I drink 64 ounces per day and more when the temperature is very hot.  If I keep up everything then I have energy for walking.  If I get behind then I don't feel up to it.    

I discovered on line Mybariatricpantry.com.  I ordered sample packs of several different protein supplements.  The milky bottled ,drinks called OH YEAH came in five flavors, one of which is banana cream.  Usually supplements are only  chocolate, vanilla or strawberry.  The banana wasn't bad and I appreciated the change.  I also got three different flavors of Isopure, a juicy supplement which does not have any carbs at all.  So far I have tasted two of them.  They need a little more sweetness, in my opinion, so I added Splenda to mine.  The third kind, called Nectar, comes in packets of powder.  I haven't tasted all the flavors yet.  Like the Isopure, it needs more sweetness.  They work best if you have a shaker.  The package says it mixes with a spoon but I had a few lumps. All the products I tried had way more protein than other supplements I have tried.  I appreciate being able to purchase sample packs to try things without having to order a whole case.                                                                                                                                                                          

So it is my task to keep the idea in my head not to be entertained or comforted by food but to remember that the engine of my body needs fuel.  Also I must learn to replace the emotional cues from tasty but unhealthy foods with other pleasures.  I learned this concept many years ago at Weight Watchers.  I just haven't been able to put it into practice yet.   If anyone has ideas I'd be glad to hear them. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

and so it goes...

Here I am 10 days after surgery and 16 pounds lighter.  Not bad.  It has been extremely warm for the past few days 100+.  We have no AC so the temperature inside the house was not too great either.  I've been drinking lots of extra water.  My blood glucose has been steady.  127 yesterday, 132 today.  Still no insulin.  Dr. Landman does not want to give me any insulin because if the glucose level bottoms out then bringing it back up will be difficult since I'm not able to take in any sugar.

My family has been great.  My daughter has been doing the cooking for the family which has been a big help.  They all feel a bit guilty when they eat and I don't but I think guilt is a good thing once in a while don't you?

I have a couple of questions.

1.  Why do all the TV ads with food look extremely delicious?  Is there a plot?
2.  Will the staples in my stomach set off airport scanners?
3.  Why doesn't the abandoned part of my stomach growl? 

Good news, UPS just delivered my package of protein supplements I ordered.  The drinks I have been buying are getting boring.  Thank heavens I can have V8 juice because that's the only thing I've been getting that has actual flavor.  I'll let you know how the new stuff is. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

Happy Birthday Baby

When I told my husband the date of my surgery he asked me why I didn't wait till after my birthday so I could still celebrate.  Well the reason I wanted to go before July 1st is because, as any nurse who's worked in a teaching hospital knows, July 1 is when all the new interns show up.

While they are supervised, they do have a lot of opportunities to impact patient care, not always positively.  As it turned out, the house staff arrived early this year and two very nice first year residents (that's what they call interns now) were writing all my orders.  My discharge instructions included returning to the same insulin regimen as before the surgery.  There was no way that was going to work.  I'd be in insulin shock before it got dark my first night home. 

When I got home I checked my blood sugar which was 144 and called my endocrinologist.  She advised me not to take any insulin at all and call her in the morning with my fasting blood sugar.  In the morning my glucose level was 140.  So I am continuing not to take any insulin at all with instructions to call the doctor if my glucose goes up to 200.  So far, so good.  The glucose level has been steady every day.

The orders also instructed me to resume all my pre-op oral medications which included metformin, for the diabetes.  Since I knew I was not to swallow any pills larger than an M & M, I knew that this inch-long football-shaped tablet would be a problem.  My endocrinologist agreed that I should not take that either.


Heaven help the non-medical people who do not know when orders are wrong and should be questioned!

Anyway, back to my birthday.  True, I did not have a birthday cake (and I love cake with LOTS of butter-cream frosting) I did inform my family that they did still have to sing "Happy Birthday" and I would blow out a candle.  I still wanted my wish!  They were fine with that. 

I refuse to feel deprived.  Instead I feel like I have given myself an amazing present.  Rev up the DeLorean because I'm going back in time!  I am going back to the time when I could wear jeans comfortably (I'll tell you right now Mom Jeans are fine with me).  I am going back to the time when I could sit in an airline seat with the tray properly down.  I will be back to having seatbelts fit without an extender.  I will be able to "walk and not be weary or run and not faint"  Time travel is an amazing gift and I am not at all worried about messing up the "space-time continuum"!

Love,
Marlena of Mohegan

Disclaimer: This is not a subject for polite company. You have been warned.

Gas is not my friend.  As I mentioned in my previous blog the surgeon inflates the abdomen with air in order to have room to work.  I've been working on getting rid of this air for the last five days.  It has not been pretty. 

I felt so huge after the surgery.  On Wednesday evening after I had been home a while I went to sit in my car to check out the fantastic detailing job my kids arranged while I was in the hospital.  I could not fit behind the wheel of the car.  Now this was two days after surgery and I had been struggling to expel the excess. 

My family has been impressed with the deep sonorous sounds of my flatulence.  Imagine the trumpeting of a mastodon looking for a mate.  You get the idea. 

The belching has not been nearly so entertaining.  That has been rather more uncomfortable.  I seem to be able to get rid of it better when I go for a walk.  I have been taking Gas-X which gives some relief. 

Today I feel a lot better.  I'm about to go for a walk and I think I'll check to see if I can fit into my car yet. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan

I'm home again

Its hard to believe how fast everything happened.  I had the surgery on Monday and I came home today, Wednesday.

I woke up on Monday with a urinary catheter which was nice because I didn't need to get out of bed to use the bathroom.  My output was pretty minimal so they loaded me up with lots of IV fluids.  They said I needed 5 liters of fluid.  The next day they weighed me and I was TEN POUNDS HEAVIER than before the surgery.  I said "wait a minute here.  I'm supposed to LOSE weight not gain".

My college chemistry professor liked to say "a pint's a pound the world around"  If you do the math five liters (about five quarts) is about ten pints of fluid and thus ten pounds.  When I got out of bed I felt inflated like the Michelin Man.  Part of that feeling was due to air which is used to inflate the abdomen so the surgeon has room to work.  Now I'm trying to get rid of all the excess air and soon (according to one of my friends that had the surgery) I will need to camp out in the bathroom for a while when all the fluid decides to come out.  So I will not be going to any parties for the next few days.  I won't be any fun to be around.

I do feel less bloated today than yesterday.  I've been enjoying clear liquids today and tomorrow I begin with the protein supplements and can have other sugar-free liquids, pudding and popsicles.  OOH!  I stay on that regimen for the next three weeks till I go back to see Dr. Choi.  After that I get to have pureed food.  MMMM.  I'll start chewing again around September.

Thanks to all who called, visited and sent messages.  I appreciate the support.  I'm sure there will be some rough days ahead but good results for the future.

Love,
Marlena

Less than 8 hours till I arrive at the hospital

I feel tired.  I had a long nap after church.  I just had a delicious dinner of raspberry jello and melon jello.  Why is it that when you can't eat anything that the commercials on tv show the most delicious food?  

My husband is really anxious.  The reason I know this is because he is running around doing laundry and other household chores.  When he is nervous he cleans.  I love him so much.  I wish I could help him relax though. 

I have to say that my husband truly loves me.  I knew early on that he was someone who would love me no matter what.  I love to relate the time when we were recently married and I was sick with the flu or something similar.  I was trying to sleep. You know how sometimes when you can't breathe through your nose and a little drool seeps out of the corner of your mouth.  This is not an attractive picture is it?  Well he came over to me and gently wiped the drool off my face.  That is really what love is.  I tried to tell my kids this.  If your spouse can still love you when you are drooling then you know that you have a keeper. 

I still haven't decided if I am going to bother trying to sleep tonight. 

Are they kidding?

I got a call from the surgery scheduler at the hospital on Friday letting me know what time to arrive at the ambulatory surgery center on Monday. 

5:45 am.  I asked if she was serious.  She was. 

I can't imagine working at that hour.  Oh, I've done night shifts but staying up has always been easier for me than waking up when it is dark outside.  So do the poor receptionists work from 5 am till 1 pm?  Do they have to wake up at 4 am? 

As for me, do I just stay up all night?  I probably won't sleep anyway.  Whenever I need to be somewhere early (outside of my usual job) I usually wake each hour to check the time.  I guess I'll just take an extra long Sunday afternoon nap in between all the clear liquid feasting I'll be doing. 

Four days left on the ticker.

I have been getting calls and messages from friends and family.  I am so thankful for all the support.  I have been on leave from work since April 1st.  I have not been away from the job that long since the last time I had a baby (and that baby is almost 22).  In a way a break from the stress of my job has been a good thing.  However, it does not take long to feel out of touch.  So it is nice to feel the love. 

In the meantime, since the hot, sticky summer weather has begun I feel no energy at all.  In spite of the Lasix my feet are swelling.  I am envious of people who are able to be active in this heat.  I am exhausted walking to my car.

By this time next year I will feel better. 

Stay cool,
Marlena of Mohegan

7 days and counting.

Its hard to believe I'm only a week away from surgery.  I need to pack. 

All systems go

On Thursday I went to Dr. Jarrett for my final medical clearance.  I also saw Dr. Choi's nurse practitioner who went each step of the hospital experience and my final instructions to prepare for the surgery.  I can eat breakfast the day before surgery but after 10am nothing but clear liquids.  Nothing by mouth after midnight except my blood pressure medications in the morning with a sip of water.  She went over every step of the pre-op, operative and post-op procedure. 

So I am ready.  I just have to avoid any illness or injury for the next 9 days.  Knock on wood. 

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan.

tick, tick, tick.....

Yes the clock is ticking.  Less than two weeks to go.  I got my letter of medical necessity from Aetna.  On Thursday I go to Dr. Jarrett for my final medical clearance and my pre op instruction visit at the surgeon's office.

I'm not the nervous type but I feel I have prepared myself mentally for whatever outcome there is.  I usually prefer the glass half-full outlook rather than the glass half-empty but having been a nurse for 32 years has shown me that things don't always end up rosy.  I've got struggles ahead but I'm ready to get started.

Last year I had a patient who had had his bypass in July and had lost 100 lbs. by October.  Now that's quick.  I won't necessarily lose that fast since men usually drop weight quicker due to their higher muscle mass and faster metabolism.  Dr. Choi wants me to shoot for losing 225 lbs.  That sounds like there won't be much left of me after that but there will be enough. 

So stay tuned for the next update as we get closer to the big day. 

Peace be with you,
Marlena of Mohegan. 

OK. Aetna says yes.

I spoke with the business office and Aetna has approved the surgery.  OK then.  Onward. 

Just when I thought I was through with hoops....

Today, well yesterday actually, I spoke to Donna in the business office for the hospital.  She says that I need my doctor's documentation of my weight from the past two years faxed to her before the insurance company will approve the surgery.  She said that she knew of one person who did NOT get approved because she was not able to provide this.  Now I don't know about other people but I did not suddenly explode to attain my current weight (which I'm not ready to divulge publicly yet).  Do they think I gained extra weight on purpose just to have my stomach cut open and have my guts rearranged?  My weight has been an up and down situation over my entire life.  I lose some and then I gain it back plus more.  What possible relevance could my weight two years ago have  upon whether or not I need this surgery now?  I honestly cannot understand these insurance people. 

What next?

Marlena of Mohegan. 

Stocking up on stuff.

I was lucky enough to find Nature Made sub lingual B-12 tablets buy one get one free at CVS.  They are cherry flavored and tasty.  I have enough to last at least 2 months after surgery.  The other day I picked up prescriptions and was shocked to pay $200.00.  That is just co-pays.  I don't want to know how much it would have been without insurance.  Some of my medications will need to be changed after surgery because the tablets are too large.  My surgeon says I probably won't need any diabetic medications anymore.  My endocrinologist says I may need to stay on some insulin.  Maybe one shot per day.  Now I take four shots per day!  I have three different pills for high blood pressure.  I am too young to be taking as many pills as I do now.  21 days to go.  I'm ready.

YaY!!!
Marlena of Mohegan.

Ups and downs.

Today I found the B-12 tablets that melt in your mouth and the chewable ADULT vitamins.  After the surgery large tablets are not permitted and I did not want to be taking Flintstones chewable vitamins.  Still counting off the days.  Only 23 days to go. 

Strange things have been happening though.  On Memorial Day we had a small cookout in the back yard.  I put on some capri pants that I had worn the previous week and were laundered once since then.  They seemed way too small.  I couldn't understand it.  Had I gained 25 pounds since last week?  Did someone put the clothes dryer on the nuclear setting?  As I was getting undressed that night I happened to check the tags and found that I was wearing my daughter's pants that were three sizes smaller than mine.

Three days later I was at the grocery store.  I was wearing my own capri pants (I checked the label BEFORE I put them on.)  They kept sliding down.  OK I guess I had some slippery underwear on but this never happened before.  As I was pushing the cart out the exit door the pants suddenly slipped down so far the waistband was by my knees.  Fortunately nobody seemed to notice before I yanked them back up.  Now did I suddenly lose 20 lbs?  The elastic in the waistband was still stretchy so they hadn't been cremated in the dryer.  

That same day I went to 7-11 and bought a Crystal Lite Slurpee.  I filled up the cup as usual then all of a sudden the thing started erupting like Mt. St. Helens.  I couldn't stop it before it ran all over the counter, the floor and my shirt (fortunately my tie dye shirt and the color of the Slurpee blended very nicely).  

I did everything very cautiously for the rest of that day.

Best wishes,
Marlena of Mohegan.

The countdown

The ticker says 29 more days till the surgery.  My family is very supportive and will be there with me when I need them. 

My daughter was worried that I wouldn't get to have any blueberries before my surgery because I look forward to blueberry season every year.  I love them with evaporated milk and a little Splenda.  She found some on sale yesterday and bought them for me.  I know I will not be able to have fruit until I get to the puree stage of the post-op diet. 

We've had a few hot, humid days this spring.  When it is really sticky it is hard not to guzzle the fluids.  I will really miss Diet Coke.  I've got a lot of adjustments to make. 

I went to Manhattan the other day and I was delivered to the door of my destination.  At lunch, I went outside and walked a mere two blocks and was short of breath and exhausted.  Walking in Manhattan is one of my favorite things to do.  I look forward to when I will be able to walk like I used to.  The sacrifices will be worth the rewards. 

The die is cast

I saw Dr. Choi on Thursday.  She spent a lot of time talking to me about the surgery.  She even gave me homework.  She wants me to start changing the dietary habits of my whole family.  In her words, I gained weight eating at my dining room table.  She feels I will have more success if the whole family eats healthier.

Other homework was an online teaching program called EMMI.  It addressed in more detail some of the things Dr. Choi discussed with me.   I can also have my family watch this so they know what to expect. 

Today the scheduler called me and my surgery will be on June 28th.  Dr. Choi does the LGPs (Laparoscopic Gastric Bypass I will use this abbreviation from now on) Mondays and discharge is on Wednesday.  Wow!  So the countdown begins.

and another hoop.

The previous post refers to appts. on Tuesday.  Today, Wednesday, I saw Dr. Chronakos, the pulmonologist.  Like the other doctors, he approves of the steps I have taken and is clearing me for the surgeon. 

I am starting to get excited because the doctors all keep saying "you will be losing a lot of weight very quickly".  It is becoming a reality.

I am really tired of dragging this load around.  Imagine if every step you took, every thing you did,  night and day included carrying another  large person piggyback.  .  There are so many things I can not  manage to do now but soon that will change. 

Getting there

Today I saw the psychiatrist and the endocrinologist.  My A1C is 7.2 which is better than last time.  Dr. Landman has already written and sent her recommendation letter for the surgery.  Dr. Herrick has also approved.  Tomorrow I see the pulmonologist.  I don't anticipate any problems in that area.


So far most of the responses I have gotten from friends and family have been in personal emails.  I appreciate the concern for my privacy and even more important I am really grateful for the words of encouragement. 

Today while waiting for the pharmacy to fill my prescriptions I ran into a friend and coworker who is having health struggles of her own.  I admire M's courage in facing the many setbacks she has had during the course of her illness.  I realize that we all have different struggles.  I don't know anyone with a perfect life.  I've known people who on the surface seem to have it all.  When you peel back the layers of their onion sooner or later you find that they had challenges of their own.  I have been shocked to find that some people I'd always envied had, in fact, wished they could be like me. 

I am lucky enough to be able to use my free agency to choose the path I want to follow to improve my health and well being.

To close this post I will quote from a fortune cookie I opened today.  "Feeding a cow with roses does not get extra appreciation".  I have absolutely no idea what that is supposed to mean.

Marlena of Mohegan

Two steps forward and one step back.

Well I was all set to see Dr. Choi tomorrow.  I scheduled three appointments with three different doctors for the same day to cut down on my gas consumption.  I got three separate calls on Friday confirming my appointments.

Today I get a call from Dr. Choi's office.  "You know your appointment with Dr. Choi has been canceled don't you?"  No, I didn't know that.  They couldn't imagine why I got the call on Friday to confirm when the appointment was canceled on May 5th.  "Nobody told you it was canceled?"  Hmmmmm.

After several phone calls I was able to get rescheduled for 5pm on Thursday the 20th.  After I accepted this I realized that the 20th is my mother-in-law's birthday.  Great.  I'm sure to hear complaints about this.

So even though I tried to "think green"  I have two appointments tomorrow, one on Wednesday and one on Thursday.  So I still need to drive to Danbury (a round trip of 52 miles) three times this week.

My homework.

Today I reviewed the book that was given to me at the initial Bariatric Surgery Seminar. I wanted to make sure I haven't forgotten to do anything before I see Dr. Choi. I found I need to be taking calcium three times per day instead of twice. I also have to find the Vitamin B-12 that is in little sheets that dissolve under the tongue.

I need to get my butt back to Planet Fitness and see if I can do some weight training without getting short of breath. I won't be able to lift weights for a while after surgery so I probably should get some muscle now while I can. Planet Fitness is great place to work out for anyone. I see people there of all ages and conditions. They have a sign that says " Judgement Free Zone" and the staff is very pleasant. Check out the link.

ABOUT PLANET FITNESS http://www.planetfitness.com/

As the most innovative health club brand in the United States, Planet Fitness is known for a lot of things - our absurdly low prices, our lunk alarm, and most of all perhaps, for our Judgement Free Zone® philosophy, which means members can relax, get in shape and have fun without being subjected to the hard-core, look-at-me attitude that exists in too many gym

Ready for Dr. Choi.

OK. Hoop completed. Endoscopy was fine. I see Dr. Choi for the first time on Tuesday. Hopefully we will set the date. It can't come quickly enough for me. My blood sugar is getting more difficult to control and my sleep is irregular.